I'm back from camp, and I've been thinking....
Didymus reaches obediently,
though it is not necessary to his belief any longer –
still, he reluctantly raises his fingers of dusty clay
toward that definitive puncture between the ribs
and releases a glint of light –
not of hidden, smoldering flame,
but the radiance of a summer sky.
Didymus reaches obediently,
though it is not necessary to his belief any longer –
still, he reluctantly raises his fingers of dusty clay
toward that definitive puncture between the ribs
and releases a glint of light –
not of hidden, smoldering flame,
but the radiance of a summer sky.
posted by KathrynTherese at 10:14 PM
4 Comments:
Yes! Yes yes yes!
Yes. :-)
Beautiful.. no.. perfect.
Folks would like to compartmentalize, in a box of weakness, the Apostle Thomas as they would the Magdalen and even Peter, but I'm glad when they don't, not to mention that these are saints and that maligning them seems or may be sacrilege. I believe Thomas' doubt sprang from goodwill in protection of a holy mission he hadn't quite understood as didn't any other unless the BVM did, because it was Thomas who'd earlier offered, "Let us go with Him to die." Could he not have thought, "If this isn't the risen Jesus of Nazareth, what a fool it may paint Jesus and all His followers." So, yes, only by obedience, now, he reluctantly puts his hand in Christ's side... and yes, what we find in Christ is never our mere expectations, no matter how glorious... We find way more -- astoundingly, thrillingly more -- but grasp-able from a veiled knowledge. Not a low quiet flame, but the blaze of Life itself.
I have a certain affinity with Thomas, I think. I struggle with doubt at times. I wrote another poem about "the twin," in which I say he was "a hair's breadth from obduracy." But was he? We cannot know. We DO know that he demanded proof, protested he would not believe without it, and even detailed what precise proof would be necessary. But I think that the moment he saw the Lord there, all that melted away.
Still, the Lord acquiesced. The Lord condescended to his need. The Lord reinforced his faith, for his sake and ours. Lest there be any doubt that Christ was indeed dead and risen, Dan Brown...
I don't remember ever feeling negative about Thomas; I just thought it was a sign of his humanity, his sadness, almost, that he couldn't believe it was true. And somehow, it helped me to be reassured that there was nothing, nothing we could ask our Lord with sincerity, at which He would take offense.
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